What if you woke up one day and could not remember the last 18 months of your life? Your husband, no longer the man you loved, but a stranger begging intrusion during one of the most difficult trials of your life? That is the premise of the highly anticipated film, The Vow, starring Rachel McAdams (as Paige) and Channing Tatum (as Leo) set for release before Valentine’s Day on February 10th. The Vow is the story of newlyweds Paige and Leo who struggle to reclaim their love after a horrific car accident leaves Paige in a coma and wipes away all her memory of him. Determined to keep the vows he made to his wife, Leo tries to pick up the pieces and win her love for a second time. Hollywood has had its share of amnesia related story lines before but what makes this film more than the typical romantic “chick flick” is that the movie is based on the amazing true life story of Christian couple Kim and Krickitt Carpenter.
In 1993, newlyweds Kim and Krickitt embarked on a journey to visit family in Phoenix for the thanksgiving weekend. Married only ten weeks, Krickitt was at the wheel when she swerved to miss a slow moving truck and was broadsided by another truck sending their Ford Escort flipping and skidding on its roof, trapping her upside down in a crushed vehicle for 70 minutes. Although Kim did suffer injuries, Krickett’s were nearly fatal. Comatose and suffering severe brain trauma, doctors gave her only a 1% chance of survival. Miraculously, she did survive but when she awoke 10 days later she had no memory of 18 months prior to the accident. When nurses asked her if she was married she claimed she was not. When they told her she did have a husband, the only name she could think of was that of her ex-boyfriend. The brain trauma caused retrograde and posttraumatic amnesia erasing all recollection of Kim in her mind and in her heart. Although he was by her side during her recuperation, Krickitt became increasingly annoyed at Kim’s presence, even telling him that she hated him. Kim, however, refused to give up on her. "I looked deep into her eyes, praying for the slightest hint of recognition. But she stared back at me, a stranger...in a way, it was harder to deal with than death,” he wrote in the memoir they would later pen together. Facing staggering medical bills, Kim returned to work feeling uncertain about their future together. “I honestly didn’t think our marriage would work,” said Kim in a 1996 People magazine article. “I made a vow before God,” he explained, “until death do you part.’”
Along with the memory loss, neurological damage and changes in Krickitt’s temperament made her a different person than the girl Kim fell in love with. Their therapist recommended that they start dating again so they could form new memories and make a new attachment. Slowly, their relationship developed and the couple married again three years later. Reaffirming their vows to each other, Kim’s promise to Krickett was a beautiful testimony to all they had overcome. “Only one thing can surpass forever the painful events we have felt,” he told her, “that is the love I have for you.” As word spread of their incredible story, they were soon featured on various media outlets such as Dateline, Oprah, Reader’s Digest, People Magazine and Dobson’s Family in Focus. In 2000, the Carpenters released their book titled “The Vow” and soon Hollywood wanted to make it into a major motion picture. Although the movie is not completely accurate to their lives, the major premise of a young couple staying true to their vows of matrimony amidst overwhelming odds remains intact.
Coinciding with the release of the movie is a new version of their book in which they share the true account of their journey together. In the movie, the couple’s Christian faith is not at the core of their commitment. “I would love to say that I fell in love with him again because that’s what everyone wants to hear,” stated Krickett in a recent article for their local newspaper, “ I chose to love him and that was based on obedience to God, not feelings…I chose to love him because I made a vow.”
It has been 19 years since their love and promise to God and each other was severely tested. The couple has two children, Danny age 11, and LeeAnn age 8. Recently, I had the opportunity to interview the Carpenters about their faith, marriage and what it was like to visit the Hollywood set inspired by their story.
Krickitt, what sustained you during the difficult times after the accident as you worked to restore your marriage? The Lord sustained me during the accident, the recovery and rebuilding of my life. I have very supportive parents and they have been married for more than 50 years so they were a great example. Also good friends and a church family.
Was there a particular Bible verse that inspired you? Philippians 4:13 is my verse, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”
What do you hope the audience will take away from the movie? I hope they are challenged to tough it out during the tough times. Love endures. We hope they pick up the book.
What do you hope readers will take away from your book? Christ is the answer. He is our rock and our strength. By taking one day at a time and believing and having faith, I knew things would get better. Also, that all things work together for good, for those who love God and to those who are called according to Christ Jesus.
Krickitt, you mentioned that Hollywood romanticized the idea of you falling in love with your husband again but the truth was more like you “chose” to love him. Can you elaborate on that? Please don’t compare the truth against the movie. For me, I did choose to love Kim and that was based on obedience to God not on feelings. I began to love the man that I had married. Not in a fluffy, pitter pat way, but a deeper and more genuine love.
How did your story become known? I prayed that if the Lord wanted to do something with our story then so be it. “Lord, I put it in your hands.” That is when the media coverage started up. There was a story on the front page of the Albuquerque Journal newspaper. It made its way to an agency in Hollywood and we allowed them to release it via the Associated Press in 1996.
Kim, what can you say to men who are struggling with their marriage relationship? Live for the moment but live seeking ways to identify common ground similar to that of what brought you together. Men communicate to solve and women communicate to share. That said, look for compromise and fight for the relationship through accountability and determination. Most of all, be humble and seek the Lord.
What was it like to visit the movie set with your kids and meet actors Rachel McAdams and Channing Tatum? It was fun to go to the set of the movie. We were there the day they were filming the wedding and taking their vows. It was fun to watch them playing us. I though t that it must have been weird for them to do it in front of us. Our kids though t it was cool. They loved it! I think they enjoyed meeting them. It was special.
Why do you think God values marriage so? We make a vow before Him. It is a promise to Him. He allows us to have kids and raise His kids in a family that is loving and caring. Marriage is the epitome of love. Marriage encompasses everything – love, sacrifice, giving, receiving and growth. It tests you, allows you go grow and develop. It allows you to feel joy and happiness. Marriage is work but it is very rewarding.
Plan on taking your sweetheart to see “The Vow” for Valentine’s Day but let it be more than a nice date night with your honey in which you are swept away by another Hollywood romance. Let it remind you of the true story behind it and encourage you to reaffirm the promise you made to that partner in life God has lead you to or will do so in the future.
For more information on “The Vow” visit www.Vowmovie2012@aol.com.
Published in The Good News of South Florida, February 2012
www.Goodnewsfl.org
http://goodnewsfl.org/dv/0212/index.html#/32/
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